The Gilmore Girls and why overly sheltered children fail in their adulthood


Happy 22 years, Gilmore Girls!

The show that’s been many girls (boys and non-binary persons) safe space was also an area that showed us how being too coddled in your youth affects your future.

Yes, we are talking about Rory Gilmore.

Many wanted to be like Rory and grow up to be her. Who wouldn’t when everything that left her mother Lorelai’s mouth, was all praises for her? She was studious, very well-read, beautiful, funny, beloved by their whole town of Stars Hollow, and unlike other geniuses who stood out in class (sorry to Paris Geller), she was actually liked by her peers and even dated really cute guys along the way.

gilmore, <b> The Gilmore Girls and why overly sheltered children fail in their adulthood </b>However, Rory also did some pretty questionable things along the way. Some eyebrow-raising moments that would be pretty infuriating to watch because as someone that was always painted to be perfect and pure, was she, really?

Rory cheated on her boyfriend Dean with Jess

The minute Jess Mariano was revealed in the show as Luke’s nephew and he brought him to the Gilmore house so Rory could “straighten him up” is also the exact moment their chemistry was shown. Rory, the ever-sweet golden child who had everybody fawning over her feet meets Jess, who was well in his teenage dirtbag years that at first we were made to believe her powers didn’t work on.

Later, we find out that Jess reveals a softer side to him but only to Rory. He’s underlined some parts and annotated a book he “stole” from Rory’s bookshelf, piquing Rory’s interest because he’s obviously read the book before in order for him to provide that much insight.

In prior episodes to that, we see her current boyfriend Dean, who was very much patient with her and indulged her as everybody around her does, but he lacked Jess’ love for reading. However, does that justify what she is about to do?

The real cheating as I see it didn’t begin when she kissed Jess while Dean and she were still together, it began when the moment Rory started looking at Jess in a different way.

gilmore, <b> The Gilmore Girls and why overly sheltered children fail in their adulthood </b>

Yes, we see Rory get torn and know that she’s done wrong, heck Lorelai even tries to help straighten her up but she does it AGAIN.

Rory slept with a MARRIED Dean!

But again, the cheating happened way before she sleeps with him.

The night she opened up to Dean about her problems at Yale may have been innocent. Kind of like the way one would just talk to an old friend (to give them both the benefit of the doubt) when times get rough. But they begin cheating on Lindsey, Dean’s wife, and Rory’s former classmate when they start seeing each other behind her back.

She just has to sleep with him, too. Regardless if he’s told her he was breaking up with her, if they were still together, that gave her absolutely no right to do it. Unapologetically, too.

When Lorelai saw them together, already knowing what happened, the only thing Rory has to say to her is, “He’s MY Dean. I had him first.” You DID have him, but you cheated on him, too remember?

gilmore, <b> The Gilmore Girls and why overly sheltered children fail in their adulthood </b>

Rory quit Yale the moment one person told her she was not cut out for her dream job.

After taking an internship at a newly acquired paper Mitchum Huntzberger, the father of her present boyfriend Logan, Rory gets told by Mitchum that she “don’t got it” to make it in the biz. A moment Rory for sure assumed she was gonna get praised.

As someone that wanted to pursue journalism all her life, it was understandable that Rory felt absolutely awful hearing this. Add the fact that the internship followed the night Logan took her home for dinner at his place and his family didn’t take her so well.

gilmore, <b> The Gilmore Girls and why overly sheltered children fail in their adulthood </b>

Lorelai knew what Mitchum told her may only have been because of that incident, but Rory went on such a downward spiral after that. She even stole a yacht and spent a night in a cell after hearing what Mitchum said.

Following that incident, she then informed Lorelai of her decision to quit Yale. Although many may see her point, it was unfair to Lorelai who had put up with so much throughout the years, for her just to quit school like that. Granted that she did still graduate on time with Paris, it was just another effect of coddling her too much as a child. One negative comment and she falters.

That’s not even all of it.

She missed her mother’s college graduation to go to Jess, her best friend Lane was pretty much dismissible to her the same way she never saw Paris as a best friend when Paris always considered Rory to be her’s. She kissed Jess when they met again and she was just entering a rough patch with Logan, and she didn’t speak to her mom for months during following her decision to drop out of Yale.

The thing is, all the good things about Rory may be true, yes. People do make mistakes too, that’s for sure but the same adoration everybody had for her growing up may have just been the very reason she was able to do all of those things.

Because no one ever saw Rory as the bad guy in all those situations.

The town painted Jess evil for “tainting” Rory and cheating on Dean, her sleeping with an already married Dean was overlooked by the town apparently, and after dropping out of Yale she and Lorelai eventually made up.

No one ever asked for accountability from Rory because she was just too good for them and that’s how she becomes a bad person.

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