I’ve forgotten when exactly I fell off the bandwagon, but I’m pretty sure I’m out of touch nowadays when it comes to my generation’s ‘dating’ habits.
Maybe it’s because I’m in my mid-20’s or I’ve had too many HIMYM marathons, but I’ve always preferred to keep it old school. It’s the usual deets: Meet the girl, fall in love, have a long-term relationship that may or may not end in marriage.
I haven’t always abided by this mindset, mind you (hence the word, ‘prefer’). But that’s the point. It’s getting harder to keep this notion alive. Sometimes I wonder if it exists at all. And if it does, is it even sustainable?
My generation is scared of commitment for some reason. We’re in an era of hookups, FUBUs and keeping it ‘casual’ – which sounds more like a video game difficulty than an actual human relationship.
These mindsets, I believe, are a byproduct of trauma.
Not to sound like your tito, but…
Social media has eroded the value of dating. Looking for a replacement for your boring SO? There’s an app for that. Just swipe right. Lost interest? Stop replying to dms and ghost that f*cker.
Social media has given people an easy way out minus the consequences. And with enough repetition, these traumatic heartbreaks morph doe-eyed individuals into callous clones of their tormentor, bound to repeat the same process on other unsuspecting fools.
Instead of entering relationships with an open mind, you now have a bunch of people who are always on the defensive, who pull the trigger at the first sign of trouble.
Soon enough, dating culture becomes disposable. After all, it’s better to spare yourself the hurt, amirite? It’ll always end the same way anyway.
Hope is not lost
As long as social media exists, this new mindset is here to stay. Hell, it might even be the norm 10, 20 years from now. But there’s a benefit to being a hopeless romantic: you’re a sappy fool who thinks the old ways will always have its magic, regardless of the odds.
In all seriousness, I pray that the youth, myself included, won’t give up easily, even after all the hurt. Besides, isn’t that what dating is all about: a trial and error until you finally meet The One?
Here’s my buddy Ted Mosby:
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